Hello my dear friends,
Today is day five and I’m starting to settle into life in Barcelona. I say that, but we haven’t ventured far from our apartment and the familiar Vila de Gracia. I say, that’s just fine. I have over 3 years to explore and learn and venture beyond comfort zones.
Just going to the market can feel like a new adventure (read: challenge). How do you say fennel? What is the right way to ask for a paper bag? Where the hell is the milk? In the past five days, I’ve accomplished: a hikes, many many walks, over five trips to the store, dinner and lunch out, lots of wine, endless convincing Tuna (the cat) that the neighbor’s dog can’t get in out apartment, and a whole ton of mixed emotions.
I’ve moved before and I’ve moved abroad before. But it always catches me off guard, the feeling of being in a new place and immersed in change and unknowns. It’s equal parts exhilarating and terrifying.
Travel and living in different countries has made me a more adaptable, flexible, curious, and confident person. But it has also made me distant at times. It may not appear to be, but I can feel it - sense of difference, of being on the cusp of leaving. I I have a nagging suspicion that if I don’t get too close it won’t hurt when I leave.
It became super clear when I was talking to my mom about moving, and she said the same thing. She grew up with a military family and moved all over the USA and later in life sought out the adventure of travel and new places. But always kept a certain amount of space between her and her community. Because in the end she knew she would leave.
I like to think we can rewrite the narratives we’ve inheritance from our parents and our ancestors. We can learn their lessons and move on. Like my great grandparents leaving Ireland and my parents leaving the States, I too can leave and explore and adventure. But I don’t have to do it in isolation. I can make connections, foster new friendships, and grow old ones. I can shape this story however I damn-we’ll please.
Sometimes I’m envious of you both, with Vashon Island always there, waiting for you. No matter where you’ve been or who you’ve become, you can come back and see old friends and be known as the girl from Vashon. Or is it hard to change and evolve and come back to a place that has generally stayed the same? How do you move through transitions? How do you find yourself in the midget of transitions of place, time, career, relationships, family?
Well, the mosquitos have arrived in time for sunset of over La Parque Collserola, so I will bid you both adieu for now.
Love you to the moon and back.
Besos,
K